urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:as_tears_go_by White Oleander White Oleander 2006-06-12T19:41:49Z urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:as_tears_go_by:29404 2006-06-12T19:41:49Z 2006-06-12T19:41:49Z Dillinger Escape Plan Cry your eyes bloodshot while there's still time 'cause soon it's gone and you'll be so shocked one queen-sized coffin<br />That was built for two is your death bed it belongs to you tease me baby please me with the fresh disease hope riding on a<br />Bullet alive tonight you know we couldn't get it right come save your life tonight you know we'll never get it right don't<br />Try to swim to shore because you can't go back say three words like they're the last you'll speak curtains drop concealing<br />Appearances of heaven destroyer they'll be another just like you you're not the only one I'm not the only one watching the<br />Fallout fly back up walking where time stands still see how our love kills dropping curtains down concealing appearances<br />Of heaven without my existence you are nothing without my affection you wilt we fucked like a nuclear war release... fuck<br />Off see how I let you down watching fallout fly back up urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:as_tears_go_by:29011 2006-05-07T16:52:18Z 2006-05-07T16:52:18Z TOM PETTY i feel like a peice of shit.<br />i've been going through my old posts wich wernt very far down the page considering i havent posted in a long ass time. but remembering so many great memories. and i miss everyone so much. and when i see old friends occasionaly, everythings so weird, and i feel left out because ive missed so much. i know i feel like this because its summer agian. memories are still lingering in the air of the previous summer. the process of change i cant even say ive noticed until right now. forgive me that was selfish. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:as_tears_go_by:28729 2006-02-19T16:15:09Z 2006-02-19T16:15:09Z fiona apple ...And that was it, over a year of my life over. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:as_tears_go_by:28488 2006-01-29T23:46:13Z 2006-01-29T23:46:13Z BNO i feel so weird updateing i think its been around year. but.. i think im doing this because im confused about life. i guess everyone is but ive never got down onmyself this hard..but ive been thinking I HATE MONEY i hate people that live for more money ... or maybe im just some kinda hippie who beleves love is everything. i would give all the money i have.(which isnt very much right now) wait scratch that for a second my mom just came down and asked me for tyhe video card and im gonna get killed when she comes back from the movie place and relizes she has a 30 dollar fee from me having 4 movies wayy over duee..woops sorry ma. okay as i was saying i would give all the money in the world to be able to walk outside in the moring and take one of those deep breaths that feel so good and so pure...i dont know if anyone will understand that, but i rememer them and ive tried but its impossible. i always remember it from when i was younger maybe back then i was just genuinly happy, and it was that breath that was good, wow this all sounds right in my head..but as i read this im a fucking nut..PUT ME AWAY!<br /><br /><br />oh its my chubbs BDAY happy b day justine collins. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:as_tears_go_by:28367 2005-03-12T16:24:27Z 2005-03-12T16:24:27Z the sundays i finally got my septum periced! woo urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:as_tears_go_by:28083 2005-02-07T16:42:30Z 2005-02-07T16:42:30Z The Good Life This weekend has been the most depressing ever! besides hanging out renee and nahee ALOT &lt;33! but matt andy and jessie are now gone, i cried so hard when andy cut his hair, it was if now it was real, and it all hit me hard. renee was there to calm me down on the ride home. i love good friends and im happy all of us are hanging out agian. we all drank at matt and andys going away party it was so much fun, adam came and picked me up to stay the night at his house with him. <br />things ive been thinking about:<br />~My chubb chubbs and how i wont see her for a while :(<br />~My car and the breaks slowly going out and how most likely ill die going home today<br />~What absolutly amazing friends i have!!!<br />~How i have to go a week without seeing adam, and he makes me in the happiest moods!<br />~Me getting to go to maryland this weekend to see my brothers new baby girl:)<br />~How i need to stop eating so much cuz my pants are hella tight right now<br />~I'm a mess! i feel like im losing everything. i miss everyone<br />I DONT WANNA GROW UP..or atleast not just yet...please dont grow up on me &lt;3 urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:as_tears_go_by:27802 2004-12-28T20:02:52Z 2004-12-28T20:02:52Z white wedding - BIlly Idol Well i leave for Chicago tomorrow, todays a very busy day i wait till the last second to pack..like with everthing else, o well. but tonight me and jackie r oging to sarahs to see her and jenna and there friends for a movie night :)then im staying the night at stephs and were leaving at 9am tomrrow, its along drive but it is well worth it and it will be fun. were planning on staying in chicago for 5 days and come back rihgt in time for school. im ognna be there for new years and i know thats gonna be amaing. well i hope everyone has a great holiday break and a awesome new years!!! ...i hope i dont get in to much trouble out there! hahaa urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:as_tears_go_by:27449 2004-12-14T17:14:02Z 2004-12-14T17:14:02Z underoath so many missed memories, with so many very missed poeple...so much has changed..I HATE CHANGE!!!!!!! and i love all of you :(....until another snowy day.<br /><br /><br />i wish i could be 7 again when my best friends would come to the front door while my family was having dinner and the door would be open because it was summer and you could barley see their heads poping up over the screen door. and me and my sister would shove our dinner in our mouths ... or i would chew it and spit it in a paper towel cuz i couldent stand my moms cooking haha. and we would run down to daves yard were we would play sports....its sad now because out of 8 of us i only talk to two of them and one is my sister whihc i talk to once a month if that, i cant belive last month was her birthday..and she turned 20...and amanda who lives across the street and neither of us are ever home....things are always bound to change ..but i wish i would have had more control over everything.<br /><br />why cant it come back,or was it that wrong. maybee it was. <br /> . . <br /> . .<br /> . .<br /> . .<br /> . . urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:as_tears_go_by:27205 2004-12-09T17:03:21Z 2004-12-09T17:03:21Z avrillllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllavigne I looked away<br />Then I look back at you<br />You try to say<br />The things that you can't undo<br />If I had my way<br />I'd never get over you<br />Today's the day<br />I pray that we make it through<br /><br />Make it through the fall<br />Make it through it all<br /><br /><br />And I don't wanna fall to pieces<br />I just want to sit and stare at you<br />I don't want to talk about it<br />And I don't want a conversation<br />I just want to cry in front of you<br />I don't want to talk about it<br />Cuz I'm in Love With you<br /><br />You're the only one,<br />I'd be with till the end<br />When I come undone<br />You bring me back again<br />Back under the stars<br />Back into your arms<br /><br />Wanna know who you are<br />Wanna know where to start<br />I wanna know what this means<br /><br />Wanna know how you feel<br />Wanna know what is real<br />I wanna know everything, everything<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />I'm in love with you<br />Cuz i'm in love with you<br />I'm in love with you<br />I'm in love with you urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:as_tears_go_by:27128 2004-12-06T03:10:26Z 2004-12-06T03:10:26Z All I know<br />Is everything is not as it's sold<br />but the more I grow the less I know<br />And I have lived so many lives<br />Though I'm not old<br />And the more I see, the less I grow<br />The fewer the seeds the more I sow<br /><br />Then I see you standing there<br />Wanting more from me<br />And all I can do is try<br />Then I see you standing there<br />Wanting more from me<br />And all I can do is try<br /><br />I wish I hadn't seen all of the realness<br />And all the real people are really not real at all<br />The more I learn the more I cry<br />As I say goodbye to the way of life<br />I thought I had designed for me<br /><br />Then I see you standing there<br />Wanting more from me<br />And all I can do is try<br />Then I see you standing there<br />I'm all I'll ever be<br />But all I can do is try<br />Try<br /><br />All of the moments that already passed<br />We'll try to go back and make them last<br />All of the things we want each other to be<br />We never will be<br />And that's wonderful, and that's life<br />And that's you, baby<br />This is me, baby<br />And we are, we are, we are, we are<br />Free<br />In our love<br />We are free in our love urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:as_tears_go_by:26657 2004-11-30T21:12:36Z 2004-11-30T21:12:36Z jimmy eat world guys tell me what you want in a girl?&gt; urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:as_tears_go_by:26488 2004-11-24T00:24:46Z 2004-11-24T00:24:46Z saosin it's like you just cant except me for me..I'M NOT SOME LITTLE TOY!...and i don't see just what's so bad about the way i am. :( urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:as_tears_go_by:26307 2004-11-23T16:35:21Z 2004-11-23T16:35:21Z saosin <table width="300" align="center" border="1" bordercolor="black" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="2"> <tr><td bgcolor="#66CCFF" align="center"><br /><font face="Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif" style="color:black; font-size: 14pt;"><br /><b>You Are the Enthusiast</b></font></td></tr> <tr><td align="center" bgcolor="#FFFFFF"><br /><center><br /> <font color="#0000CC" size="+6"><br /> 7<br /> </font><br /></center><br /><br /><font color="#000000"><br />You are outgoing and playful - always seeing the happy side to life.<br /><br />You're enthusiastic and excitable. You love anything new.<br /><br />Multi-talented, you do many things well... and find success easy.<br /><br />You prefer to keep things light with others. Opening up is hard for you.<br /></font></td></tr></table><br /><br /><div align="center"><br /><a href="http://www.blogthings.com/numberquiz.html">What number are you?</a><br /></div> urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:as_tears_go_by:26083 2004-11-19T17:40:16Z 2004-11-19T17:40:16Z drop it like its hott in video right now<br />need a cigggggggggggg FAJUCK! <br />last ngith was fun i gott out of work and went over to my chubbys and went to wendys yummm...i think ive been eating wendys almost everyday now, and bad enough at that i always get the same thing..to bad its ooo effing GREAT!<br />ooo man chubb chubbs this weekend better be amazing, i need a good weekend.<br /><br />pffh, only one more hour after this :) Heh. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:as_tears_go_by:25733 2004-11-18T15:32:56Z 2004-11-18T15:34:03Z unicorns Kelly sugg just said im gonna get fat..and all the candy i eat is gonna go to my ass :(<br /><br />anyway i hope i get fat..cuz i need a cigg GOD DAMNIT!<br />hahah mine and sarahs journalism paper is so half ass, woops<br />CHAD UR the fucking SHIT.<br /><br />alriht work tonight then its the weekend hells ya<br />ugfuidsghdjshfhlkshf <br />so much time left till i go home.<br />CHUBBY I MISS YOU<br />i'm gonna cry urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:as_tears_go_by:25580 2004-11-10T18:09:11Z 2004-11-10T18:09:11Z aerosmith *pink* in video productions woo!, actually i'm kinda pissed because i got a contract in this class for skipping to many times..FUCK! my mom said i was grounded but 20 minutes after that susan came over and my mom said i could go out haha..i love it, always seems to happen like that. well today i don't have to work which is bad ass, so im going to wait for chubb chubbs to get outta school and go out with her for the night, and i don't know what else but if you want to catch up give me a call, i'm supposed to also go out with Ian to dinner tonight..I CAN'T FORGET! :) im so pooped i think before i do anything i should take a 2 hour nap, its been sooo hard getting up for school the last few days. but i should go help my group film.<br /><br />MINDI IS MY RAPEIST! 0ooo000OOoo00oOo00oooo...<br /><br />&lt;# KElL urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:as_tears_go_by:25261 2004-10-23T18:15:24Z 2004-10-23T18:15:24Z underoath well im currently at braed's, hes playing me some songs (:, ya so my moms outta town and i have to work today what a crock! ooo well. ill get off at 10, and then just not go home tonight. BRAEDLEY LOOKS SO CUTE PLAYING! haahahah..well last night was the last night i'll see chubb chubbs for a week :(!!!!!!! YOUR TUBBY LOVES YOU! anyways shits all been depressing latley! where is the SUN?!?!??!?!?!??!?!?!??!?!?!? come out i have missed you!<br /><br />p.s i wanna go to a haunted house! and i need to get some plans for halloween! urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:as_tears_go_by:24949 2004-10-07T15:16:18Z 2004-10-07T15:16:18Z Ahahaha...oh mna its been ages...what up bitches!<br />me and sarah are sitting in journalism....yes, no im bored as fuck!<br />well today me and sarah are going over to braeds and then off to friendship park, i think i wanna play some frisbeeeeee!<br />so at otech, today was just amazing! we were working on our maniquins and i finished earlie so we could just do whatever we wanted so i put mines hair in a hu8ge mohawk it was so bad ass, it look like a fantasy runway model, and then me and a few girls got into how it would be a theme for wild ponys and we ....sfgsdjgnhbdi; time to go ill finish later<br /><br /><br />KP urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:as_tears_go_by:24693 2004-07-23T03:28:32Z 2004-07-23T03:28:32Z wooooweeeeee <div align="center"><form name="quizform" target="_new" action="http://www.kwiz.biz/showquiz.php?quizid=9970" method="post"><br /><table border="1" bordercolor="#000000" bgcolor="#90BED5" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="2"> <tr><td colspan="2" align="center" bgcolor="083360"><a href="http://www.kwiz.biz/showquiz.php?quizid=9970" target="_new" style="text-decoration: none;"><font style="color : #ffffff; font-family : Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;" color="#ffffff"><b>Your LJ Perfect Date</b></a></font></td></tr> <tr><td><font style="color : #000000; font-family : Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">LJ Username </td><td bgcolor="#D8F3F3"><input type="text" name="in0" size="32" maxlength="64" value="as_tears_go_by"></td></tr><tr><td><font style="color : #000000; font-family : Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Gender </td><td bgcolor="#D8F3F3"><select name="in1" size="1"><option value="female" selected="selected">female</option><option value="male">male</option><option value="umm%2C+lemme+check">umm, lemme check</option></select></td></tr><tr><td><font style="color : #000000; font-family : Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Mood </td><td bgcolor="#D8F3F3"><select name="in2" size="1"><option value="happy">happy</option><option value="horny">horny</option><option value="sad">sad</option><option value="angry">angry</option><option value="notalgic">notalgic</option><option value="annoyed">annoyed</option><option value="other" selected="selected">other</option></select></td></tr><tr><td><font style="color : #000000; font-family : Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Choose a random word </td><td bgcolor="#D8F3F3"><input type="text" name="in3" size="32" maxlength="64" value="scooper"></td></tr><tr><td><font style="color : #000000; font-family : Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Your Perfect Date</b> </td><td bgcolor="#D8F3F3"><font style="color : #000000; font-family : Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>shermboat</b></font></td></tr><tr><td><font style="color : #000000; font-family : Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>You have dinner at</b> </td><td bgcolor="#D8F3F3"><font style="color : #000000; font-family : Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>a bar</b></font></td></tr><tr><td><font style="color : #000000; font-family : Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Afterwards you</b> </td><td bgcolor="#D8F3F3"><font style="color : #000000; font-family : Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>go to a carnival</b></font></td></tr><tr><td><font style="color : #000000; font-family : Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Your date asks you</b> </td><td bgcolor="#D8F3F3"><font style="color : #000000; font-family : Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>to movie in together</b></font></td></tr><tr><td><font style="color : #000000; font-family : Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>You say</b> </td><td bgcolor="#D8F3F3"><font style="color : #000000; font-family : Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Can we talk about this tomorrow?</b></font></td></tr><tr><td bgcolor="D8F3F3" colspan="2" align="center"><font style="color : #000000; font-family : Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Chance you will get lucky - <b>95%</b></font><br><table align="center" width="250px" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" border="0"><tr><td height="5px" bgcolor="#006600"></td><td height="5px" bgcolor="#00cc00"></td><td height="5px" bgcolor="Lime"></td><td height="5px" bgcolor="#99ff66"></td><td height="5px" bgcolor="#ccff99"></td><td height="5px" bgcolor="#ffff33"></td><td height="5px" bgcolor="#ffcc00"></td><td height="5px" bgcolor="#ff9900"></td><td height="5px" bgcolor="#ff6600"></td><td height="5px" bgcolor="#ff3300"></td></tr><tr><td height="10px" bgcolor="black"></td><td height="10px" bgcolor="black"></td><td height="10px" bgcolor="black"></td><td height="10px" bgcolor="black"></td><td height="10px" bgcolor="black"></td><td height="10px" bgcolor="black"></td><td height="10px" bgcolor="black"></td><td height="10px" bgcolor="black"></td><td height="10px" bgcolor="black"></td><td height="10px" bgcolor="black"></td></tr><tr><td height="5px" bgcolor="#006600"></td><td height="5px" bgcolor="#00cc00"></td><td height="5px" bgcolor="Lime"></td><td height="5px" bgcolor="#99ff66"></td><td height="5px" bgcolor="#ccff99"></td><td height="5px" bgcolor="#ffff33"></td><td height="5px" bgcolor="#ffcc00"></td><td height="5px" bgcolor="#ff9900"></td><td height="5px" bgcolor="#ff6600"></td><td height="5px" bgcolor="#ff3300"></td></tr></table></td></tr><tr><td colspan="2" align="center" bgcolor="#083360"><input type="submit" name="submit" value="Try Your Answers!"></td></tr> <tr><td colspan="2" align="center"><font size="-1" style="color : #000000; font-family : Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>This <a href="http://www.kwiz.biz/" style="color : #000000;"><font style="color : #000000;" color="black">fun quiz</font></a> by <a href="http://www.kwiz.biz/userprofile.php?userid=16987"><font style="color : #000000;" color="#000000">akasha82</font></a> - Taken 23063 Times.<img src="http://images.kwiz.biz/kwizcount.gif" width="1" height="1" border="0"><br /></font>&lt;/a&gt;</b></font></td></tr></table><font style="font-family : Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 9pt;">New - COOL <a href="http://www.datingtips.ws/" style="text-decoration: none;">Dating Tips and Romance Advice</a>!</font></div><br /></form></font></font></font></font></font></font></font></font> urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:as_tears_go_by:24574 2004-07-21T18:39:05Z 2004-07-21T18:39:05Z authority zero "find your way" ahhh i wiah it wasnt so hot! but i have to go to work in an hour it kinda sucks but whatever i need money to fix my car. summers going great! i just wanted to do a quick update and hope that everyones summers going good, i miss everyone!!! MUAH<br /><br />Kelly urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:as_tears_go_by:24130 2004-07-08T05:30:14Z 2004-07-08T05:30:14Z joydrop if it is true that love is only for the fools that fall behind...then so be it urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:as_tears_go_by:23939 2004-07-08T05:29:28Z 2004-07-08T05:32:31Z joydrop if it is true that love is only for the fools that fall behind...then so be it urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:as_tears_go_by:23725 2004-06-11T00:10:15Z 2004-06-11T00:10:54Z the velvet teen yes! tomorrow is the last day of school till summer, scorige! but i finallly got a job so my mom can get of my ass about it every second! tj maxx baby! haha but anyways everythings pretty cool lateley, i like it :) i miss you braedley mapebrown! :) soon! i just got off the phone and everyone was over his house im kinda bummed i had to work i couldve went out, but i guess i need to study for exams so no time anyways. jon got a turtle! ahhhhh im so excited to see it tomorrow! yeaha! but ok amandas coming over so we can catch up, so im out.<br /><br />xoxoxo Kelly urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:as_tears_go_by:23331 2004-06-05T15:41:59Z 2004-06-05T15:41:59Z at the drive in pattern aganist user family is so fucked up! how am i still smiling :)<br /><br /><br />i love you all!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:as_tears_go_by:23190 2004-05-28T16:54:40Z 2004-05-28T16:59:48Z The Velvet Teen *no one will ever love you* i don't mean to be forward...but please die!<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />WHERE IS THE MADNESS THAT YOU PROMISED ME!???!!!!!